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These Kids Today!
So, there I was, having just dropped the kids off at school. I was on my way to do the weekly chores of shopping, dry-cleaning, and other mind-numbing necessities of a homemaker. I was halfway through the department store when I needed to call the wife and ask her what she wanted for dinner. I reached into my pocket for my cell and found emptiness. I thought to myself, "How the heck did I not remember to put my cellphone in my pocket?" I retraced my steps and couldn't even remember putting it on the counter, where I usually see it every morning before I load up the kids. So, I just chalked it up to absent-mindedness-something I am not usually known for. After departing the store, I proceded on to the dry-cleaner where I picked up the weekly bundle of dry-ceaning. It was then getting to be about noon and I headed home for a quick lunch and quicker search for the missing cell. While eating, I got a call from the school. The assistant principle informed me that my youngest son had just caused mass hysteria in the school by pulling one of the fire alarms. She proceeded to tell me that she wasn't very happy about this and shouldn't he know better than that? I listened with my head in my hand, rubbing my temples and thoroughly unable to conceal a grin. I apologized profusely and asked if she would like for me to come and pick him up. She thought for a moment and the thought crossed my mind that this person was about to suspend ME, as if I was a five year old in her school. She finally said that no I didn't need to pick him up but she would like for me to talk to him. He was sitting there in the office with her. So hooligan #3 got on the phone and I asked him why he did that. He said he was sorry over and over again and I couldn't help but think that Mom and I had never covered the subject of school fire alarms. I calmed him down and told him that he should not pull a fire alarm unless there was a real fire. It dawned on me later that that sort of responsibility is a bit beyond the capacity of a 5 year old to grasp. So, after he got upset and we came to the understanding that only parents of small children can reach, he dried his eyes and gave the phone back to the assistant principle. I again apologized for the event and she asked me to talk with him further when I picked him up. I assured her that I would. The missing cell phone was forgotten for the moment. After I got off the phone with the school, I called the wife and told her what had happened. She got flustered and I informed her that I had handled it until we all got home, at which time we would all sit down and discuss the do's and don't's of school fire alarms. After I hung up with her, I just had to chuckle. I went about the rest of the afternoon doing those homey things that a stay-at-home parent does. When it came time to pick the kids up, I again realized that the cellphone was still missing. I searched the house for it and came to accept the fact that it just wasn't in the house. I knew for a fact that I had put it on the same table I always put it on everyday. But it wasn't any place I could find. So, I just figured that the wife had done something with it and when she got home, we'd have a good laugh over it. When I walked into the gym to get my 3 boys, the teacher of my middle child approached me. Behind her, with his head hung low was hooligan #2. As she approached, I noticed that she had something in her hand. A closer look revealed it to be my cellphone. When, he finally raised his head and looked at me, he knew he was in big trouble. His teacher informed me that he had been pretending to talk on it for most of the day, disrupting the majority of the class while he was at it. She asked me if I had given it to him, a seven year old. I told her that I had not. She said that she didn't think so. While discussing his behavior in class all day with the teacher, he tried a couple of times to interrupt and tell me something. I kept hushing him and he grew flustered. When the teacher finished with me, we left the gym and headed to the car.
When we got into the car, the cellphone snatcher finally blurted out, "Dad, I wanted to tell you that I have been trying to call you all day!" I asked him why he wanted to call me and he said, "I wanted to tell you that the school was on fire and to come and save us!"
At the end of the day, my wife and I had the necessary talks with the boys and we all reached an agreement about other people's property, school fire alarms, and the fact that due respect regarding these things should be shown at all times. When we put the kids in bed that night, my wife and I had a good laugh over the day's events. It just goes to show you that no matter how thorough a parent you might think yourself to be, you'll always discover that you are lacking in some areas.
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Contributor's Note
Written and experienced by Randy Henderson, the Homemaker.
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The 3 Hooligans
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Funny story. Thanks for the intel.
So right about the five year old. At 5, who really understands implications about pulling fire alarms? It would be hard to be stern in that situation, I'm sure and then the phone... You've definitely got "kids". :)
Great story! Boys will be boys. 
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This intel was contributed by specop4
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May, 2012
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